The Fizzle and the Sizzle

“the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue center light pop and everybody goes Awww! Jack Kerouac -On the Road

Katy Perry’s new single Firework did something for me the other day. It made me realize that I am a burned out Firework. I was a Firecracker once. I once had that passion for work, school, marriage, child rearing, even my appearance. What happened?

Perry’s song draws reference from Jack Kerouac’s novel of random thoughts–On the Road. They both claim that it’s people that show their sizzle, their spark, their passion for life that sustains the day. I need some of that; I need some of that around me. Most of the time, I gravitate to a couple of people who are my fireworks. My daughter and my sister. My daughter; is an exploding firework. I do sit back and go Awwww! I can’t wait to see her perfect road. I am extremely proud of her, her accomplishments, her talents, her beauty, even her scary downward spirals when she makes mistakes and picks herself up. She dazzles me. My sister is a fabulous yellow roman candle. She lights up a room, is quick with the wit, and is hilariously funny. She explodes with confidence and sister crazy.

Maybe it’s the first born syndrome? The Serious One? Was I always? I don’t think so. My sorority sisters would say otherwise. As I got older I lost my spark? Has the harshness of age, trials and tribulations beaten me up? The Mojo is gone?


Maybe the line: Do you ever feel like a plastic bag; drifting through the wind, wanting to start again? YES! I do!

The line: Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin, like a house of cards, one blow from caving in?
YES! I do!

But then the hopeful lines:   Do you know there's still a chance for you? Maybe you're the reason all the doors are closed, so you could open one that leads you to the perfect road? 
Where IS that? 
So I have pledged that Firework is my new anthem. For me and the other Fireworks in my life. I hope we all show the world what we’re worth. Make 'em all go AH AH AH.